


Of Bondings and Exhaustion

by Adariall



Series: The (sometimes disastrous) Courtship of the Emotionally Inept [5]
Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Durincest, Emotional Constipation, Love Confessions, M/M, Marriage, No one deprives Dis of arranging her baby's wedding, Sappy, Some people will never mature, Thorin finally makes an honest man of Kili, Uncle/Nephew Incest
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-16
Updated: 2013-11-16
Packaged: 2018-01-01 17:52:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,082
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1046787
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Adariall/pseuds/Adariall
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After Erebor is reclaimed and after both Thorin and Kili have recovered from the injuries they sustained during battle, they are finally bound in front of all of the mountain. Kili didn't expect the process to be more terrifying and exhausting than fighting an orc army and Thorin finds himself battling old fears that have come back to roost after coming so close to losing all that he holds dear. No one ever said that a bonding would emotionally mature them.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Of Bondings and Exhaustion

**Author's Note:**

  * For [QueenDurin](https://archiveofourown.org/users/QueenDurin/gifts).



Kili curled up against his uncle's side and rest his head against his breast. He felt a sudden wave of exhaustion crash upon him; far heavier than he'd ever felt before in his life. He supposed that it wasn't abnormal, bonding ceremonies were an extended ordeal lasting hours upon hours and the last sleep that he could remember even finding remotely restful had been no less than a week before. He'd craved his bed for the entirety of the time since then, had longed to lay his head upon the soft pillows that he knew would adorn the head of the bed in the chambers that he would share with his husband, the blankets and furs as well. He'd wished for nothing more than an escape, a way to end the ceremonies early, but it was impossible, and he knew full well that his mother would have both of their heads if they tried to avoid any of their obligations. 

"Thorin?" He mumbled groggily. "C'n I ask you something?"

"Anything."

"How is anyone expected to consummate their bonding after that."

There was a pause and then Thorin's chest rumbled beneath his cheek. One of his husband's large hands cupped the back of his head fondly and he felt lips press against his brow. "I have no idea, âzyungel."

"They're mad if they even try." Kili's voice slurred as he turned his face into Thorin's chest. "Completely and utterly mad."

"Yes they are." Thorin stroked the back of his hair for a moment before he wrapped his arm more firmly around his waist. "And you are as well if you do not close your eyes and sleep yourself. You have done both of us proud with the way that you handled yourself throughout the past weeks, but I never had any doubt about that to begin with. You deserve a full night of sleep."

Kili nodded and kissed the skin beneath his mouth before he draped his leg across Thorin's thighs and stretched out across his chest like a particularly large cat.  
"Sleep now then."

"Yes, sleep now." Thorin's voice rolled over him and Kili relaxed even further against his husband's chest.

"Love you."

Thorin's breath hitched in his chest for a moment before he exhaled slowly and his arm tightened around Kili's waist once more. "And I you, âzyungel. For the rest of our lives, and until the end of time."

Kili's lips twisted up into a grin that he couldn't wipe from his face and he closed his eyes tightly as he attempted to settle in for the night. Time seemed to pass very slowly and his world narrowed down to the sound of Thorin's heart thumping beneath his cheek and He was mostly asleep when he felt Thorin's chest rumble beneath his cheek once more. Thorin's hand slid through his hair and he felt him kiss the top of his head once more. He remained still against his side, uncertain as to what Thorin intended to do. He was rewarded for his patience quickly as Thorin's fingers traced along the curve of his neck and he sighed softly.

"I wish in this moment that I were stronger than I am," he murmured in the silence. "I wish that I could have the voice to tell you everything that is in my heart while you are awake to hear it as I did once before, but I cannot." Thorin's voice faltered for a moment and Kili fought against the urge to make it known that he was awake, but before he could move, before he could say a word himself, Thorin's chest rose as he inhaled sharply and he began to speak once more. 

"You have given me everything that I had never thought that I would be able to have; you have given me everything that I have ever wished for. For so many years I longed for a mate, to have someone by my side to spend my life with and until you came to me I thought that it would not happen. When I returned to the settlement for your coming of age ceremony I could never have expected to have found you in the way that I did. You embraced me even though you barely even knew me and you pulled me into your life. I hadn't even been there for a full day and I knew I couldn't fight you, and I still can't. You gave me life, âzyungel, you gave me hope." Thorin cleared his throat and the hand that had been pressed against his neck trembled. "I do not believe that you will ever know how much I love you, sanlukhuduh, but I swear that you have my heart and you will have it far beyond the day when you and I have both return to stone and reside with Mahal once more." 

His voice trailed off and he exhaled softly before his hand stilled against Kili’s skin and he finally relaxed against the down filled pillows. Thorin yawned widely and Kili felt the previously tense muscles below his cheek begin to relax. “I do not know if I will ever be able to say that to you when you are awake, but it doesn’t make it any less true. I am yours as you are mine.”

As Thorin lapsed into silence once more, Kili recalled another time when they had spoken those words to each other. It had been so much simpler then and even though it had only been a matter of years it still seemed so long ago. He thought back to the hours upon hours that he and Thorin had spent in bed before the quest, the quiet moments they had shared even while Thorin worked day and night to ensure their place. There had never been any doubt as to how Thorin felt about him; it was obvious in everything that he did and his words, both spoken and unspoken. If there was anything in the world that he knew to be true it was Thorin’s feelings for him and he knew that as Thorin had spoken so softly only minutes before, that he would be loved even long after they both died. Perhaps one day, he thought to himself with a soft smile as Thorin’s body went limp and his breathing deepened. Perhaps one day his husband would be able to speak the words, but in Kili’s heart of hearts it did not matter and it never would.

**Author's Note:**

> âzyungel - (the) love of love  
> sanlukhuduh - my perfect (true/pure) light


End file.
